The One Airplane Etiquette Problem Middle Seat Passengers Can’t Stand

The middle seat is already one of the least popular places to sit on a plane. You’re wedged between two strangers, competing for armrest space, and hoping neither passenger spends the flight leaning into your seat.

One traveler recently shared an experience that made an already uncomfortable seat even worse. They ended up between a couple who had booked the window and aisle seats but spent much of the flight talking to each other across the person in the middle.

The incident happened on a short flight from SFO to RDM. The couple had apparently chosen the two outer seats in hopes that nobody would book the middle, but the traveler had purchased a last-minute ticket and ended up sitting right between them.

Booking the window and aisle seats isn’t unusual for couples traveling together. Many people use this strategy in the hope that the middle seat will remain empty, but things can get awkward when another passenger takes it. The problem wasn’t where the couple sat. It was that they continued their conversation across the middle passenger for much of the flight.

mid seat

Many Travelers Thought the Couple Should Have Offered a Seat Swap

Several commenters felt the couple could have avoided the awkwardness by offering the middle passenger either the window or aisle seat. That would have allowed the couple to sit together without making another traveler feel caught in the middle of their conversation.

One person described a similar flight with a father and son who kept talking over the passenger between them. The traveler eventually asked if either of them wanted to switch seats, but the father declined, so the passenger asked them to keep the conversation down.

Another commenter said they use the window-and-aisle booking trick with their spouse but offer the middle passenger one of their seats if someone books it. That way, the stranger gets a more comfortable spot and the couple can sit together.

Many travelers felt this was a reasonable bit of courtesy. There’s nothing wrong with hoping the middle seat stays open, but once someone has paid for it, they deserve to enjoy their flight without being treated like an obstacle.

Related: 16 Annoying Things Flight Attendants Wish Passengers Would Stop Doing

Some Couples Use the Same Trick Without Creating a Problem

Not everyone felt that booking the window and aisle seats was rude. Several travelers said they do the same thing with their partners and have no trouble sharing the row with another passenger when the middle seat gets booked.

One traveler explained that their spouse likes the window while they prefer the aisle. If someone takes the middle, they put on their headphones and keep to themselves for the rest of the flight.

That seems to be the difference between a harmless seating strategy and an uncomfortable experience for another passenger. If the middle stays empty, the couple gets the seats they prefer, and if someone books it, they simply give that person room.

Related: JetBlue Says It Tracks Flight Searches—Here’s What Travelers Should Know

The Real Problem Is Courtesy

Most of the criticism wasn’t about couples choosing the window and aisle seats. It was about expecting the person in the middle to put up with a conversation happening right over their head.

Couples can hope nobody books the seat between them, but they can’t expect a paying passenger to sit there feeling like a barrier between two people. Having someone talk across your lap or pass food, drinks, and phones over you can make an already cramped flight feel even more uncomfortable.

There are easy ways to avoid putting another passenger in that position. Couples can offer a seat swap, send messages to each other, or save their conversation until they reach the airport.

A little consideration can make a big difference for the person stuck in the middle. That seat is uncomfortable enough without having to spend the flight caught between someone else’s conversation.

Related: Flight Attendants Say They Know Who the Difficult Passengers Are Within Minutes of Boarding

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