Moving into a new apartment usually means getting to know your neighbors, figuring out the building, and settling into a routine. But one renter says their new upstairs neighbor wasted no time making a request that left them questioning whether they were being unreasonable for saying no.

The tenant, who shared the experience on Reddit, explained that they pay nearly three times as much rent as the upstairs units because their apartment includes private access to a backyard and basement with a washer and dryer.

When a new couple moved in upstairs, they reportedly wanted access to both amenities, even though neither was included in their rental agreement. What started as a simple request quickly turned into an uncomfortable disagreement.

nick night qM 2NDZFs9g unsplash 1 — Photo by Nick Night on Unsplash

The new neighbor wanted access to the backyard and laundry room

According to the Reddit post, the renter and their fiancé have lived in the first-floor apartment of a converted townhouse for six years. Their unit includes private access to the backyard and basement, which they pay considerably more for than the upstairs tenants.

Shortly after a new couple moved in upstairs, the woman approached them while they were leaving for the grocery store. She asked whether she and her boyfriend could use the basement washer and dryer and occasionally spend time in the backyard.

She even suggested setting up a laundry schedule so they wouldn’t interfere with the downstairs couple’s routine.

The renter wasn’t comfortable with the arrangement. They explained that they work from home, have a cat they don’t want escaping through an open door, and don’t particularly want people they barely know coming in and out of their private living space.

They also pointed out that they pay substantially more in rent specifically for access to those areas.

The landlord reportedly had a different story

What made the request particularly uncomfortable was something the new neighbor said during their conversation.

She claimed the landlord suggested asking the downstairs tenants about using the amenities and said sharing them should be fine. Rather than take her word for it, the renter contacted the landlord directly.

According to the original poster, the landlord denied ever having that conversation with the new tenant. He also confirmed that the upstairs apartment did not include access to the backyard or basement and said the couple knew what was included when they signed their lease.

That clarification reinforced the renter’s decision not to share the space.

The neighbor didn’t take the rejection well

The disagreement apparently didn’t end with the initial conversation. The renter said the upstairs neighbor began complaining on the phone outside, describing them as entitled and unneighborly for refusing to share the amenities.

She reportedly argued that she had assumed the backyard was communal when she rented the apartment and was frustrated about having to take her laundry to a laundromat around the corner.

She also claimed the refusal made her and her boyfriend feel unwelcome in their new neighborhood.

The downstairs tenant was left wondering whether they should have agreed to share the space, perhaps in exchange for payment, or whether refusing was the reasonable choice.

Reddit users overwhelmingly supported the renter

Responses largely favored the downstairs tenant, with many commenters pointing out that paying for private amenities doesn’t create an obligation to share them with neighbors.

Several were particularly concerned about the new neighbor’s claim that the landlord approved the arrangement, especially after the landlord reportedly refused to discuss it.

Others raised practical concerns about allowing unfamiliar neighbors into a private apartment to use laundry facilities. They questioned who would cover the additional water and electricity, what would happen if laundry was left sitting in the machines, and whether the arrangement could become difficult to manage.

Some commenters also felt the renter had already been more accommodating than necessary by suggesting they might reconsider after getting to know the couple better.

A smaller number acknowledged that confusion about backyard access can happen in multiunit buildings, particularly when outdoor areas are visible from upstairs apartments. However, they emphasized that tenants should clarify those arrangements with the landlord rather than assume shared access.

Being neighborly doesn’t mean sharing everything

The situation raises a question many renters can relate to: How much should you be expected to share with the people living around you?

There’s nothing particularly unusual about neighbors occasionally borrowing something or helping each other out. But allowing someone regular access to your private backyard or laundry facilities is a much bigger commitment, especially when those amenities are part of what you’re paying for.

It also highlights why renters should understand exactly what’s included in their lease before moving in. A backyard, parking space, storage area, or laundry room might look like a shared feature, but that doesn’t necessarily mean every tenant has the right to use it.

In this case, the renter wasn’t refusing to share a communal amenity. According to their account, they were simply choosing to keep the private spaces included in their rental agreement private.